It’s funny how the older I get, the more I truly value a good night in. Being busy parents that work full time jobs and run a photography business, it can be super hard to find time (especially in the busy season) to really connect with your spouse. Being intentional about making time for our marriage is HARD, somehow when life gets nuts I feel like it’s the first thing to get thrown in the closet, not see the light of day. As business owners, its hard to put down the computer or the camera and just be. There is so many todo lists. They are exciting and fun, we want to do It all, but prioritizing our week, day and honestly even down to the hour is one of the only ways we have been able to keep our head above water it seems.
1. We purpose to sit down once a week. Even if its for 15 minutes before bed and talk about the next week. Remind each other of the todo lists and things we HAVE to get done this week.
2. TEXT you spouse every day. It takes 30 seconds to say I was just thinking about you. Or I prayed that God would give you energy today I know you didn’t get much sleep last night. or.. “Hey I was checking you out when you left this morning for work;)” Haha. Brett a words of affirmation guy and I’m so bad about being consistent with actually telling him areas he is crushing it in! So texting is a great way to start even if I’m not actively saying it.
3. Pray for your spouse. Of course, this is an obvious one, but are you actively praying for God to protect, guide, and help your husband lead your home? Are you praying for God to help you forgive the foolish hurtful thing he spoke to you in anger? Are you praying to God to guide your marriage in whatever area you are struggling in?
4. Find one simple thing you know you do that drives them crazy and start to change. I vowed literally at the alter on our wedding day that I would work harder at closing the kitchen cabinets. I’m a clean freak, so it doesn’t make a lot of sense to me why don’t shut them. I guess in my mind it’s just the two of us I’ll close them before bed not gonna worry about it till then. I found out shorty after we got engaged that it really bugged Brett that I didn’t take the time to close them. It’s something so simple that means so much to him.
5. Encourage your spouse to connect with others, THIS ONE! Such a huge thing. For various reasons, Brett and I both have struggled to find close relationships with others. Brett being bullied through a lot of his school years has made it a challenge of him to open up to any male figures, and I having grown up in a homeschooled family where I didn’t have a lot of friends just a lot of siblings I struggle to connect at times. Which can REALLY effect our marriage. Our spouse isn’t meant to fulfill every need that we have. Healthy relationships with close friends I think only makes our marriage stronger. Having a solid friend who will listen and offer advice and at times correction in areas keeps us humble and keeps us on track. I feel so refreshed and ready to tackle whatever has been stressing me out after some good old soul sister time! (Thats what I’m calling it always;)
These truly aren’t profound and there are so many other ways you can work on making conventional connection with your spouse. These are just a few of the ways that has helped us keep our marriage and love for each other strong. Have a great week friends!